Tuesday, August 16, 2005

My Kinda Jokes!

If metaphysics is being qua being; and if epistomology is knowing qua knowing; then metaphilosophy must be... qua qua qua. ============================ "GOD is DEAD" -- Nietzche "Neitzche is dead" -- GOD ============================ Philosophy is a game with objectives and no rules. Mathematics is a game with rules and no objectives. Theology is a game whose object is to bring rules into the subjective. ============================ The toughest question on a Final Exam in a Senior Philosophy class: "Just exactly how do you plan on making a living with a Philosophy degree?" ============================ One more question: Q. Is this a question? A. If this is an answer! ============================ How many philosophers does it take to change a light bulb? "Hmmm... well there's an interesting question isn't it?" "Define 'light bulb'..." "How can you be sure it needs changing?" Three. One to change it and two to stand around arguing over whether or not the light bulb exists. ============================ Student: "Sir..What does Crash Course in Logical Assumptions mean?" Professor: "Well, it involves taking information that you have, forming assumptions using logic, and then creating new information. Let me try to answer your question by asking you a question. Do you own a car?" Student: "Uh...Yes, I do." Professor: "Well, then I can now logically assume that you drive." Student: "Yes, I drive. " Professor: "Then I can logically assume that you drive on weekends." Student: "Yeah, I drive on weekends, I go out on dates." Professor: "Then I can logically assume that you have date partners." Student: "Well, yes, I have a girlfriend." Professor: "Then I can logically assume that you are heterosexual." Student: "Uh...hell yes! OK, I think I understand what this course is about now. Thanks a lot for your time." Once outside, his friend asks him: "So, what's it all about?" With the new knowledge he just received, he replies, "Its about using information and stuff...Let me answer your question by asking you a question. Do you own a car?" "No." "Uh...Then you're a homosexual, dude!"

1 Comments:

Blogger innommable said...

LOL! Love the last one!

8/16/2005 03:58:00 PM  

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